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My Celebrity Ex-Boyfriend: Jack White
I was willing to get over the whole Renée Zellweger thing. I know how it is with actors, even when they're not actually actors: You're on an isolated movie set, everyone's dredging up powerful memories in order to emote on cue, sometimes there are sexy period costumes... Things happen. I thought we could work through it. I thought, maybe, it might even make our pretend relationship stronger.
But, Jack, you really should wash your hair when you're trying to prove, in court, that you're not a creepy psycho. If you can't figure that out, I just don't think there's a future for us. And, seriously, I know you're a rock star, and I'm willing to make allowances for that, but I really need a man who bathes.
PROPS TO UNCLE GRAMBO FOR THE PHOTO
January 20, 2004 | Permalink
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Comments
Hey, you have a journal! And with actual content too (as opposed to, say, mine). Awesome.
But Jack White still belongs to me. It's been preordained by the fates.
Sorry I haven't emailed you in ages. I'll get on that soon.
Posted by: Michelle | Jan 21, 2004 6:45:44 AM
For some reason this look of his reminds me of Michael Jackson's current look....
Posted by: Ted | Jan 21, 2004 10:12:10 AM
Sweet Jesus! First Eric says his mugshot looks like Corey Feldman, and now you, Ted, are comparing him to el Wacko. As you know, it's over between me and Jack, but I think you boys are maybe a little jealous, no?
Posted by: Jessica | Jan 21, 2004 10:15:59 AM
I still think he's hot and I'm jealous of Renee Z
I guess its time for me to stop daydreaming and get a life of my own, if Jack is meant to be with me it will happen one day...
Posted by: lee lee | Jan 24, 2004 12:07:13 AM
okay, so jessica, i feel that this question is going to make me look like a dumbass, but im willing to take that risk with the chance that i can know for sure. did you really date jack white? okay, and as a follow up question, do you really like the white stripes? because damn...they suck.
Posted by: Steven | Mar 15, 2004 2:14:48 PM
omg, they so totally do not suck. that's an f for you! go to the back of the class! and no cussing, young man.
and, in answer to your first question, i only dated jack white in my dreams. [sigh.] we are back on again, by the way: yes, he's a scary hillbilly, but i kind of can't help luving a man who punches out another guy while defending his own "honor and integrity."
Posted by: jessica | Mar 15, 2004 2:27:47 PM
Im sorry, Jessica. Im quite sure you and I cannot possibly be talking about the same band. The one with the drummer who cant play a riff more intricate than what a 3 year old child could write? The one with a lead singer who's voice would make the general public cringe were it not for his guitar skills? The same guitar skills he wont hesitate to point out at any given time?
Its okay for you to like the White Stripes, just know why I dont like them. I still love you Jessica :)
Posted by: Steven | Mar 15, 2004 2:30:58 PM
but, steve, i luv meg precisely because she is like a little girl -- a bad little girl who likes to hit things with sticks. and i don't care that jack white yowls: so do all our finest bluesmen.
i like bands that play not because they are good, but because they can't help it.
of course this difference of opinion in no way diminishes my fondness for you. i will not, however, be telling my celebrity boyfriend jack white about this conversation, though, as he may then feel forced to defend his integrity and honor with fisticuffs ;)
Posted by: jessica | Mar 15, 2004 4:19:07 PM
p.s. steve, you are totally hardcore.
totally.
Posted by: jessica | Mar 15, 2004 4:20:52 PM
::laughs::
Posted by: Staci | Mar 15, 2004 10:01:40 PM
Okay, Jessica, I will agree with you that the White Stripes do play simply to play and not for the industry. I cant help it if they dont play very well. Oh well...its cool.
Rock on hardcore, Jessica...
P.S. Im not egotistic or anything, but I could definately take that scraggly bastard...Just saying...
Posted by: steven | Mar 15, 2004 10:04:58 PM
kinda hard to bathe when yu've been held in a police station all night.
jack rox. and if yu would notice, in that picture he giving whoever took it the look of death. was it u?
Posted by: Ghost | May 16, 2005 8:23:30 AM
you cant say you love jack white (john anthony gillis) and want him to bathe. its part of his nature. you should no that by now, since you claim to love him and all. your pretty much a poser jack white fan anyways so i guess it doesn't matter.
Posted by: amber | Apr 26, 2006 3:37:11 PM
amber, i can't tell you how much it pleases me to be called a poser. omg.
thanx!
jessica
Posted by: jessica j | Apr 26, 2006 5:10:14 PM
who cares what people say about jack he's hot!!! and i love his music!
Posted by: ariana | Sep 13, 2006 8:32:47 PM
hey! jack white is amazing! so is meg! i am going to see them at a concert soon!!
Posted by: friend | Jul 16, 2007 5:55:36 PM
